I am a Woman..

I am in an awful mood today and I am tired of being pushed around with someone else taking my decisions for me, judging things on my behalf and telling me what to do… Here’s what I have to say to them… to the world… to everyone who has the misconception that they can do so… and get away with it.. I have claws and I wish to show them today…

Better Still… Don’t Piss One Off…

I am a woman and so I know some basic things about my life. I know I am smarter, wiser, more resourceful and more forbearing than a lot of men on this planet… I will let no man hypnotize me into thinking otherwise. I know what I am, but today… I wish to tell all others that don’t, too…

I am a woman and so I know that many a times, silence is necessary. I keep quiet, not because it is what I am born to do. I keep quiet because I do not wish for a situation to escalate. I convince myself that if I back down just this once, things will be alright. It is not that great a battle to lose. I keep telling myself ‘it’s a small thing, it’s a small thing’. There are times that it is not a small thing, but then, didn’t I say that I was smarter, I must do what the men can’t… accept and deal with it…

I am a woman and so I let you wear the pants. Not because I cannot handle the pressure and responsibility, but because I do not wish to make my house a power struggle of two egotists. I let you make the decisions and just settle with giving the inputs, not because I believe that you can take better, wiser, more mature decisions, but solely because I trust you to do what’s best. It is not because I can’t, that I let you do some things, I let you do them because I am a woman, and I know how much making them may mean to you. If that makes you think that I am a pushover, maybe I am to blame for that. If I do not stand up for myself, maybe people will keep walking all over me, by taking advantage of the fact that I tend to put you first.

I let you interfere in all my dealings, I ask you for millions of little advices and I always consult you before taking a decision, even the most personal ones. Not because I cannot do so by myself, but because it is necessary for partners to stay that way… fifty-fifty. If I ask for one place which is mine to ruin or mess up, be it the kitchen, then so be it then. I choose not to interfere in your affairs and I ask you to leave one such place for me too, with no interferences, good or bad.

I don’t have a life apart from you, with my friends, family and relatives. Not because I cannot have it, but because my life starts and ends with you… and it is so because that’s what I want. While you go out with your friends, I wish to accompany you, not because I wish to do anything specific there, but just because it makes me feel like I am a part of yours. I will hate to build a parallel life with my friends which doesn’t have you in it, but if that’s what it takes, then there will come a time when I will learn to enjoy it too.

If I am childish then so be it. I don’t complain that you’re too mature and I expect the same of you. I am childish for being a child keeps me away from the harshness of this male dominated society. If I seek my joy by wearing rose tinted glasses, then so be it. If you cannot change the world for me, if you cannot change realities for me, if you cannot give me the balloons and roses, soft toys and doggies, then just allow me to be a child. Being a child does not undermine my intellect or my understanding capability, it just gives wings to my imagination.

I am a woman and I know that I do some things that I do not always agree with, just to keep peace. I may have a caustic tongue sometimes, but that is just to protect myself from hurt. Remember all those times, you just say some simply hurtful things, in very sarcastic tones. Yup, my tongue cuts the conversation short and protects me from them. Yes, I am emotional, but that’s because I am built that way. I do not settle things with verbal combats and fist fights, I settle things by learning to be at peace with the things I cannot change. My tears are my outflow, which enable me to forgive and forget. My tears are not my weakness, let them stop and you will see how I come out fighting.

I know the mechanics of relationships and while you’re too macho to accept that you don’t, try not to judge me when I play a little politics. If the games I play keep your relationships safe with me, with no internal misgivings, no internal fights and no hidden daggers, aren’t they a good thing. There are places where you cannot speak up, like between you mother and your wife, there are places where I do the same. I am a woman so I know what I must do, if you do not understand it, just leave it be.

I am a woman, I know for a fact that there are some things just beyond you. I do not require you to do them everyday. I do them to keep you from them. This is not because it is my job as a woman to do them, nor is it a household duty assigned specifically to me. I do them because if I don’t somebody will have to, more specifically you. But just because I do them, do not mistakenly assume that I shall do so each day, each night for all eternity. Do not make the mistake of assuming that I am solely a household help. I will not reduce myself to that and neither should you. I do them because you are my responsibility and I love you, not because it is my lot to bear. Do not confuse responsibility and duty, for they are quite distinct.

I can go on and on, for being a woman, I have no full stops. Yet, for one time, this is enough liberty to my thoughts. I am a woman and am proud to be that. If you do not find anything laudable about it, maybe you should try being one, just for one day, maybe. And maybe it is high time, I start living like a man…

Originally published on Buzzle.com
http://www.buzzle.com/articles/i-am-a-woman.html